Implied vs. Assumed (Zach)

BFF-Heather and I have been discussing a recent episode from our life as BFFs. We don't seem to agree on how something should have been understood so we decided to take full advantage of our BFFB and let you help us decide. So please, take a minute to read, and then vote on how you understand the situation.

Zach's account:

A month ago (approximately), Kate and I decided to go to the races. We hadn't seen each other in some time so we decided to get together and hang out. As stated above, we planned on doing this at the races. In our decision, we involved nobody else. It was only the two of us that planned the event. In all the talk of getting together (granted, there wasn't that much detailed discussion) having a meal was NEVER mentioned. The ONLY thing that Kate and I ever discussed doing together was going to the races for the day.

Leading up to race day, a few friends were invited to join us. The week before the races, apparently Kate and said friends decided to have dinner after the races. Once again, let me stress, that I was NEVER consulted about dinner. I was never involved in any discussion about dinner after the races. I never once mentioned going to dinner after the races.

Two days before race day, Kate asked if I was going to dinner. I said, "I don't know. Maybe." That was the ABSOLUTE FIRST time I was ever involved in any discussion about me going to dinner after the races. I never said anything prior to this conversation nor during this conversation that might imply that I was going to dinner. My answer was simply, "I don't know. Maybe." ...which means, there's a chance that I might go, and there's a chance that I might not go.

This is the point of the story when BFF-Heather and I got our social signals crossed. She told me that the mere planning of going to the races IMPLIED that I was planning on going to dinner afterward. I disagree; she ASSUMED that I was going to dinner after the races, but I never IMPLIED that I was going to dinner.

My arguments:

1a) As stated, I had never been involved in any discussion about dinner with Kate, the person I planned the day with, up until the point when she asked me if I was going to dinner. To which I answered, "I don't know. Maybe."

1b) I had never discussed going to dinner after the races with ANYONE prior to the same discussion with Kate that point 1a refers to. BFF-Heather told me that they were going to dinner after the races, but she never once asked me if I was going, and I never made a single comment about going to dinner. In fact, I specifically discussed with BFF-Heather doing other plans at that same...at which point she said she couldn't because she was having dinner. Once again, let me stress that I NEVER spoke of me going to dinner, nor gave any indication that I would be joining the dinner party.

2a) As a rebuttal to a point that BFF-Heather has tried to make to me....she has said to me that precedent had been set: it was the norm to go to dinner after a day at the races. My response is that the past 2 times I've been to the races with this same group of people, I have not gone to dinner with them afterwards. Actually, at the time of this writing, I cannot remember ever going to dinner after a day at the races with BFF-Heather. I'm not saying that I never have; I just can't specifically remember having ever gone to dinner after the races with BFF-Heather. If precedent had indeed been set, then I was very unaware of it as based on my prior experiences.

2b) In all actuality, this was the 1st time Kate and I ever went to the races together. It was the 1st time we ever organized going to the races. I find it difficult to understand how precedent had been set concerning a 1st time event.

3) Others in the racing party did not join us for dinner, and it was my perception that nobody thought that those absent from dinner were breaking any socially implied obligation. The reason: it was NEVER implied that they were joining us for dinner. Nobody thought that just because they came to the races with us then they would also be joining us for dinner. The two events, racing and dinner, are not correlated in that way. Doing one does not imply participation in the other. Those that left us to go home after the races without joining us for dinner did so freely because they NEVER implied that they would be joining us for dinner. Yes, they said they would come to the races. Yes, they came to the races. No, they were never involved in any discussions about going to dinner after the races. (Wow. Their story sounds very similar to someone else's.) I don't think it was ever implied that they would be joining us for dinner. Hmmmm.

Conclusion:

BFF-Heather assumed that I was going to dinner.

It is not implied that one is going to dinner just because one goes to the races (see argument 3).

I never spoke of going to dinner.

I was never involved in planning dinner (....planning dinner apparently as part of an event that I planned, or helped to co-plan with Kate).

Now go and vote.

One Continent, Two Vacations....

Recently, BFF-Heather and I have been spending a lot of time in the same country. Why?

Good question. Some might say it's because....... Hmmm, I don't know what some might say.

Well, to fix this 'same country' stalemate, we decided set off in two directions. BFF-Heather went to Hong Kong. I went to Vietnam. Wow. What an experience we had....together...apart.

Let me tell what BFF-Heather learned from this experience. She can tell you her perspective of my experience if she so chooses.

BFF-Heather says that Hong Kong = Pretty Darn Tootin' Alright.

BFF-Heather says that Hong Kong is the best place in the world. She can prove it.

BFF-Heather has been motivated by Hong Kong to get into the financial business...via a financial husband.

BFF-Heather thinks that not all Chinese people are bad.

BFF-Heather would have loved for time to stand still while she was in Hong Kong. She likens her feelings to those of residents of Hong Kong in the mid-90s who were loyal to the British Crown.

BFF-Heather thinks that Hong Kong is pretty darn tootin' alright.

You should go there.....and take BFF-Heather with you. It's what she would want.

One Story, Two Perspectives.....

One Continent, Two Vacations....

May I go to the John?

BFF-Heather is not overly-thrilled about the youngest kids we work with at our school. She deems them unstable.

I teach the two youngest classes at our school. She doesn't teach the youngest classes. I think I need to share an experience from class today since she is incapable of sharing any experiences from the youngest classes.

I have a class of 6 students. They are all 1st year English students. Whenever they want to go to the restroom, I am very strict about making them ask properly: "May I go to the restroom, please?" One of the girls, Ivy, enjoys being creative with this question. Whenever another student asks, "May I go to the restroom, please?" she immediately follows with something along the lines of, "May I go to the Zach Teacher?" or "May I go to the book?" or "May I go to the chair?"

Well, Ivy's question today was concerned with the little boy sitting next to her. His name was John. This is how things happened:

Juny: "Zach Teacher, may I go to the restroom, please?"
Me: "Yes, you may."
Ivy raises her hand.
Me: "Yes, Ivy?"
Ivy: "May I go to the john?"
I smiled. I laughed. I said yes.

BFF Interview

The following is an excerpt from an interview conducted by Zach McMahon with Heather Mitchell on July 19, 2009:

Zach McMahon: Good evening, Madamoiselle Mitchell. May I call you "Madamoiselle?"

Heather Mitchell: ...yes?

ZM: Good. So, I recently heard that you had the thrilling experience of riding in a car elevator for the first time ever today?

HM: Yes. Yes.

ZM: Would you care to elaborate?

HM: Yes, I would. It was fantastic.

ZM: Thank you. I think all of our readers feel much more enlightened about your experience today....

HM: ....it was fantastic AND exciting.

ZM: Okay. Thank you for being a very "to-the-point" interviewee. You make my job of editing your comments very easy. Now, there's been recent news about a new endeavor you and your BFF have embarked upon.

HM: hmmmm

ZM: Once again I ask, would you care to elaborate?

HM: Yes. (long pause) ummm.

ZM: Let me help you. You seem to be having difficulty putting your thoughts into words. You are a fan of current events. Right?

HM: Yes, I am.

ZM: So much so, that you've decided to devote a blog to the discussion of current events. Right?

HM: Yes, we have.

ZM: We? Who is this "we" that you speak of?

HM: My BFF and I. We blog.

ZM: And for those out there that may not know, who is your BFF?

HM: Zach.

ZM: Me?

HM: Yes.

ZM: Oh. That's exciting. What can readers expect to find on this new current events blog?

HM: Current events. Current events stories. Comments. Opinion, opinions....on current events stories.

ZM: Wow. That is much to be anticipated. Do you expect this blog to be popular?

HM: Yes. Very. We have good opinions.

ZM: I'm sure some of our readers are asking themselves this question right now: "Will Heather's comments and opinions be longer and more insightful than her answers to the questions in this interview?" How would you respond to that, Heather?

HM: Yes, they will.

ZM: I am sure that you have instilled a large amount of confidence in your readers with that...very long...and insightful....response. Now, where can we find this new blog?

HM: www.onestorytwoperspectives.blogspot.com

ZM: Wow! One Story!? Two Perspectives!? What exactly does that mean?

HM: It means that there is one story, but we have two different perspectives on that story. It's our BFFB theme.

ZM: Do y'all, or should I say, 'we,' always have two different perspectives?

HM: Yes.

ZM: So you are saying that the readers will NEVER find a story with 100% harmonious comments and thoughts on this new blog?

HM: Probably no. Probably, but... I wouldn't say never.

ZM: Haha. It seems like you might be stumped. Tell me, are others allowed to comment on stories they read at y'all's current events blog?

HM: Yes. Yes? No....yeah, right? Just yes. One yes.

ZM: Wow! Well, folks, I hope this interview inspires you to click on over to www.onestorytwoperspectives.blogspot.com right now and read, AND COMMENT, on the world's current events. I know I'm inspired. I can't wait to read about Heather's insightful thoughts on the world. Thank you very much, Heather.

HM: You're welcome.

Best Friends See Harry Potter

Tonight we went to see Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. It was FANTASTIC. We did not draw scars on our foreheads as maybe one Best Friend wanted to do more than the other Best Friend (and I think more than anyone else that went with us), but we had a great time. You see, above all else, this movie is about a small group of BFFs talking about their feelings (and fighting dark wizards). It was right up our alley, what with my Best Friend Zach's new dedication to sharing!

So: Harry Potter- Wonderful Movie, You Should See It With Your BFF.

Donkatsa (spelling variations acceptable)

I don't think this blog has discussed the importance of donkatsa enough. Honestly, I tend to neglect doing just that in my day-to-day conversations. Maybe I'll start having a daily discussion with my BFF-Heather on the importance of donkatsa. That's what BFFs are for, right?

I mean, that is what my BFF-Heather tells me. Sometimes she thinks that I don't understand what being a BFF entails. Maybe she's right. She tells me that one of the foundations that a BFFF (Best Friend Forever Friendship) is built upon is the simple/complex action of sharing thoughts and feelings.

I'm told that I don't do a good job of sharing my thoughts and feelings. Well, that ineptitude ends right now. Right now I am thinking about the delicious culinary delight known as donkatsa. And because that thought weighs heavily on my mind right now, I am going to share that with you. My sharing will not end here, though. The next time I see my BFF-Heather, I will proceed to share my thoughts on donkatsa with her.

Donkatsa - Is there anything not laudable about this delicious culinary treat? (rhetorical question) Second to the mighty Kimbab (or Gimbab, depending on the Konglish you choose to use), donkatsa is the greatest treat to come out of the eastern hemisphere. Donkatsa tastes good. It is usually always served with a nice splattering of side dishes. It tastes great. It is cheap. Its taste is not compromised by its low-cost. Similarly to my good friend, Ryan, it makes me a better me. Contrastly to my good friend, Ryan, donkatsa does its best when it is filled with cheese. Unfortunately, the same can't be said for Ryan. (We'll save that discussion for another post.)

Well, the time has come for me to end this post. Kimbab Chankuk beckons me. I hear they are running a special on donkatsa right now. I think they're calling it the, "Donkatsa is Special! Don't you know this!?" - Special.

TEAM DARTS - Part II

= AWESOME. Yes. It is.